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Fixed
I opened the New York Times app this morning to see, As Kids, They Thought They Were Trans. They No Longer Do. Cue complicated somatic...

calcates
Feb 2, 20244 min read
0 comments


Disparity is Death*
*(This piece was originally published as a Healwell blog on August 3, 2023.) None of us know the names of the Black women with breast...

calcates
Aug 4, 20234 min read
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Motels, T-shirts and Evil
The odometer blinks 1221 miles as I turn off the engine. Four a.m. in Fort Collins is far behind us and Arlington is a long way away. We...

calcates
Jul 12, 20236 min read
6 comments


Don't Be A Meme
In Embrace Fearlessly the Burning World, Barry Lopez, lifelong humanitarian, naturist, author, and lover of the earth and all of its...

calcates
Jun 19, 20235 min read
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An Open Invitation to Every Human..
who thinks "there is a time and a place to talk about social justice and inequality" It’s interesting how here and now is never that...

calcates
Sep 27, 20223 min read
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Shooting in the Dark
“Why does this keep happening?”, we ask in heartbroken disbelief. It keeps happening because it’s an option. The ubiquity of guns in this...

calcates
May 25, 20224 min read
1 comment


Why I Get Up
I like to ask real questions. When I meet a person and they say, “My husband this...” or “My wife that…” I regularly ask, “Do you like...

calcates
Apr 23, 20224 min read
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Harmless
I’m going to tell you a story. It’s still happening. To me. Inside me. This story is not about you in any specific sense. That said, my...

calcates
Dec 11, 20214 min read
1 comment


Bad Advice
I have given a lot of bad advice. I never meant to do it. It just happened. I was trying to help. I was trying to stop the pain. Aren’t...

calcates
Sep 10, 20214 min read
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Skunk
“I always enjoy Cal’s presentations, but I thought it was deeply inappropriate to throw Critical Race Theory into the middle of a...

calcates
Sep 6, 20213 min read
2 comments


Bound Up (explicit)
We are nothing without each other and yet, we treat each other like we’re nothing. We have got to do so much better. Last night, my...

calcates
May 6, 20213 min read
0 comments


Look kids! Big Ben!
Martin Luther King Day will be observed in our nation for the 26th time this year. Ronald Reagan signed the bill in 1983 and the first...

calcates
Jan 18, 20215 min read
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Is that Folgers?
“Gah! That guy just spilled my coffee!” Actually, “that guy” just spilled whatever was in your cup. Could have been water. Could have...

calcates
Jan 15, 20213 min read
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The Chips
We had an election. The chips fell, as they say. One guy didn’t win. That’s how elections go. There’s a person who wins and a person who...

calcates
Jan 7, 20213 min read
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Resolve
I live in Arlington, Virginia “Arlington will be a diverse and inclusive world-class urban community with secure, attractive residential...

calcates
Dec 31, 20203 min read
1 comment


Mind the Gap
Remember that scene in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade where he comes barreling down the stone passageway into what looks like a...

calcates
Dec 21, 20205 min read
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When the Boob is on the Other Foot
On Monday morning, I went to a consult with a surgeon to see about having what is often called in the trans community "top surgery." For...

calcates
Dec 15, 20207 min read
1 comment


The Shadow Knows
I have been hanging out at the bedside of dying people for about 15 years now. Every time I tell someone who doesn’t also do that work...

calcates
Dec 8, 20207 min read
1 comment


Trigger Happy
“Ugh. That thing she said? It totally triggered me.” How many times have you heard this or something like it in the last handful of...

calcates
Dec 2, 20205 min read
0 comments


Do I Look Small in This?
I’ve been reading The Person You Mean to Be: How Good People Fight Bias by Dolly Chugh. Oh, man. Every time I pick it up, I make sure I’m...

calcates
Nov 16, 20203 min read
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