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calcates
Feb 2, 20244 min read
Fixed
I opened the New York Times app this morning to see, As Kids, They Thought They Were Trans. They No Longer Do. Cue complicated somatic...
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calcates
Aug 4, 20234 min read
Disparity is Death*
*(This piece was originally published as a Healwell blog on August 3, 2023.) None of us know the names of the Black women with breast...
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calcates
Jul 12, 20236 min read
Motels, T-shirts and Evil
The odometer blinks 1221 miles as I turn off the engine. Four a.m. in Fort Collins is far behind us and Arlington is a long way away. We...
6 comments
calcates
Jun 19, 20235 min read
Don't Be A Meme
In Embrace Fearlessly the Burning World, Barry Lopez, lifelong humanitarian, naturist, author, and lover of the earth and all of its...
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calcates
Sep 27, 20223 min read
An Open Invitation to Every Human..
who thinks "there is a time and a place to talk about social justice and inequality" It’s interesting how here and now is never that...
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calcates
Apr 23, 20224 min read
Why I Get Up
I like to ask real questions. When I meet a person and they say, “My husband this...” or “My wife that…” I regularly ask, “Do you like...
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calcates
Jan 20, 20222 min read
Moments: Exhibit A
A morning like so many others. Uneventful. Lunch-making and listening. The stagnant grey of mid-January in northern Virginia calling...
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calcates
Dec 24, 20211 min read
Replenish
Love and merriment to you, friends. I hope you'll make time to be overcome, if only momentarily, by blessed gratitude for whatever it is...
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calcates
Dec 11, 20214 min read
Harmless
I’m going to tell you a story. It’s still happening. To me. Inside me. This story is not about you in any specific sense. That said, my...
1 comment
calcates
Oct 15, 20213 min read
What We Say When We (Struggle to) Say They
The thing about “they” as a pronoun is that it is far from neutral, particularly when heard and used, or -- not heard or used -- by...
1 comment
calcates
Sep 10, 20214 min read
Bad Advice
I have given a lot of bad advice. I never meant to do it. It just happened. I was trying to help. I was trying to stop the pain. Aren’t...
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calcates
Sep 6, 20213 min read
Skunk
“I always enjoy Cal’s presentations, but I thought it was deeply inappropriate to throw Critical Race Theory into the middle of a...
2 comments
calcates
May 6, 20213 min read
Bound Up (explicit)
We are nothing without each other and yet, we treat each other like we’re nothing. We have got to do so much better. Last night, my...
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calcates
Jan 25, 20214 min read
Dear Body
Dear Body, As your only and most faithful tenant these many years, I must say, you’re the bomb. Lest you think me a common mid-Atlantic...
5 comments
calcates
Jan 15, 20213 min read
Is that Folgers?
“Gah! That guy just spilled my coffee!” Actually, “that guy” just spilled whatever was in your cup. Could have been water. Could have...
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calcates
Dec 2, 20205 min read
Trigger Happy
“Ugh. That thing she said? It totally triggered me.” How many times have you heard this or something like it in the last handful of...
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calcates
Nov 16, 20203 min read
Do I Look Small in This?
I’ve been reading The Person You Mean to Be: How Good People Fight Bias by Dolly Chugh. Oh, man. Every time I pick it up, I make sure I’m...
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calcates
Nov 4, 20202 min read
Alive
Humans are afraid of death. Don’t fight me on this. It’s a thing. It’s well-documented. There are those of us who have worked to make...
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calcates
Oct 26, 20204 min read
Gimme That Ol’ Time Repression
"Pull your shirt down!" came an adult female voice from off-field. I was playing football with the boys again. It was summer. It was hot....
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calcates
Oct 13, 20203 min read
This Ain't Twilight
“Hey, Bear. What’s up?” I move across my son’s bedroom toward his slumped little 10-year-old self behind the end of his bed. A sad scene,...
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